About me – karen aberle

Relationship is a most fundamental skill.

Good relationships form the foundation for everything we long for in life.

Relationship is a domain of learning. Like music or sports, you practice to get good at it.

Simply learning the basics creates more love – at home, work, and in the world.

I offer the path to mastery.

I’m the author of Love’s Invisible Dance. For the last three decades I’ve been teaching relationship to thousands of people – in corporate leadership programs and community workshops around the globe.

Welcome to my world.

About me


I thought love was something that you found.  I found it twice.  At 19 I escaped a “normally dysfunctional”  family (I say that because paternal abandonment, abuse, and alcohol are more normal in modern life) to marry the man who gave me my first orgasm.  We had two children together before we divorced six years later.  My second husband initially fit my pictures of the prince but was no longer after six years (again!)  I just figured I found the wrong guys.


In the emptiness and pain of separation, I was left to consider “who am I?”  At 38, I defined myself as a twice divorced woman with two teenagers daughters in private school, no job, no alimony, or child support; I was good at some things – sculpting, cooking, celebrating, and selling.   Making my way in the world would require a better definition than that.   My challenge was to learn how to create an offer that brought my best selves together.  So,  I studied the philosophy of language – how we understand and create reality with our words and designed a 30-year career teaching corporate executives to do the same for themselves.

On a spiritual level, Who I Am is expressed by my beliefs about the world, other beings, and my values about what is good, and the point of life.  Until I began asking questions, I never saw the ways I dishonored myself, others and Mother Earth.  I had never learned about honor.  In search of better understanding, I walked the medicine path of the Huichol Indians of central Mexico for almost two decades.  They taught me to see the sacred interconnected web of life.


While studying language, I fell (again) in love with a fellow student. As we learned from indigenous elders, we discovered the invisible dance.  Bringing the worlds of language and spirit together, we have designed an increasingly juicy 30-year relationship.  I didn’t find this love.  I co-created it.   This book captures our learning.